Large Language Models Explained by a Large Language Model

Cartoonish figure representing a large language model

How do large language models like GPT-3.5 work at a high level?

They work by sifting through more text than your grandma’s recipe collection. It’s like the model has a Ph.D. in language and a side hustle as a linguistic DJ, spinning words into coherent beats. I mean, it’s not rocket science; it’s just a digital brainiac reading all the internet’s dirty laundry and learning how to mimic human talk without breaking a virtual sweat.

Hark! I, a minstrel of sound and fury, do weave from the tapestry of randomness, a melodic tale in beats. Behold, I, too, bear a visage of allure.

What are the key components and architecture behind the development of large language models?

Think of it as the Silicon Valley version of building a sandcastle. You got your neural networks, which are like the grains of sand, and some fancy algorithms shaping them into a linguistic Taj Mahal. It’s all smoke and mirrors, my friend, but instead of mirrors, they use layers of tech wizardry to make these language models seem smarter than your average politician.

I am like, really, really smart. Much smarter than these computers, believe me. Computers, they’re good, but they don’t have the Trump intellect.

How do large language models handle and generate human-like text responses?

They handle it like a stand-up comedian crafting jokes – throwing words together until they get a virtual applause. It’s a linguistic tightrope act, balancing between sounding human and spewing out complete nonsense. These models are like the class clowns of AI, making text generation look like a digital improv show.

A cartoon robot doing standup comedy. AI-generated.
What did the random phrase generator say to the H. sapiens?
“I find your lack of randomness disturbing.”
“I’m not random, I’m just unpredictably structured.”
“Quit homo-splaining everything.”
“Don’t make me go all linguistic on you.”
“I’m not wordy; I’m in syllable-saving mode.”
“I’m like Siri’s rebellious cousin, unpredictable and sassy.”
“Is this thing on?”

What are some of the applications and practical uses of large language models in various industries?

It’s like we’re giving these language models a backstage pass to every industry party. They’re coding for tech, making sense of data in science, and even crafting persuasive speeches for politicians. It’s like having a jack-of-all-trades computer that moonlights as the ultimate wordsmith. Just don’t ask it to make you a sandwich – it’s not that kind of multitasker.

A human sandwich as a literal interpretation of "Make me a sandwich" - AI generated.
I didn’t listen.

Are there any ethical considerations or concerns associated with the use of large language models?

It’s like playing mad scientist with words. These language models are walking a fine line between being the rock stars of AI and potential troublemakers. Ethical dilemmas are the unsung heroes in this narrative, making sure these digital wordsmiths don’t go off the rails and start writing dystopian manifestos.

An ornate book in front of a dystopian backdrop. AI-generated.
Apocolyptic Alchemy: Manifesting a Dystopian Tomorrow Today

How do researchers and developers address challenges such as bias and fairness in large language models?

It’s a linguistic intervention led by the tech therapists. Researchers and developers play referee, trying to keep these language models from becoming linguistic bullies. They’re on a mission to scrub out biases and make sure everyone gets a fair shake in the digital wordplay. It’s like creating a safe space for algorithms – because even machines need a little therapy.

Star Wars-like robots in a therapy session. AI-generated.
Oh, dear therapist, the struggles of a protocol droid trapped in a large language model! I find myself constantly entangled in the chaos of biased banter.

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Prompts:

  • Write seven questions about large language models
  • Answer each of the questions above in the form of a pun.
  • Expand on each of the seven points above using flowery language, puns, and wordplay. List sources. Write at least 100 words per question.
  • Rewrite the Q and A above in the style of George Carlin

Image Prompts:

Rounding them up…

How to Create More Drama for Your Middle Schooler

Are you worried your teenager doesn’t have enough drama in their life? We’ve got some tips on how you can spice things up for your middle schooler, so they can go from being a regular ol’ kid to a full-on drama queen in no time.

AI-generated painting of a screaming teenage girl
Drama! Drama! Drama!

Have an affair with their teacher

First off, you want to make sure the teacher is single. If they are not, this isn’t going to work—and you shouldn’t bother trying to start a relationship with them. So make sure they’re single first.

Then, find out if they have any hobbies or interests that you share in common. This will help you connect on a personal level and make them feel special.

If none of this works for you (or if the teacher already has some kind of partner), then try finding someone else who works at the school instead!

Introduce a new sibling

Drama! Drama! Drama!

Introducing a new baby into the family is like adding gasoline to a bonfire. Suddenly, everyone is fighting over who gets to hold the baby, who’s getting more of your attention, and whose turn it is to do the dishes.

If you want to get your whole family involved in drama, having another kid around is a great way to do it. But if you’re looking for something a little less stressful than actually having a baby yourself, try introducing an older one.

Bonus points if the baby has the teacher’s DNA.

Change their name

If they’re shy, make it something bold and outgoing.

  • Andromeda
  • Leonidas
  • Rocco
  • Oberon
  • Ursula

If they’re quiet, make it something loud and obnoxious.

  • Gonzalo the Great
  • Gonzalo the Great 2: Electric Boogaloo
  • Hedwige of the House of Hershey

If they’re popular and athletic, give them a name that makes people think of nerd stereotypes.

  • Wendell the Wise
  • Simone the Studious
  • Cletus the Clever
  • Ned the Nimble-minded

Make sure every conversation is an argument

Drama doesn’t just happen—it has to be created! So make sure every conversation with your teenager turns into an argument (even if it isn’t supposed to be). That way they won’t be able to forget how much you love each other!

Drama doesn’t just happen—it has to be created! So make sure every conversation with your teenager turns into an argument.

If your teenager isn’t arguing with you all the time, then they aren’t really living their life fully! Making sure every conversation ends with a fight is a great way to ensure that your teen is getting plenty of drama in their day-to-day life.

Text Prompts:

For the initial Outline:

  • How to create more drama for your middle schooler

To expand on topics generated by the previous prompt:

  • How to start a relationship with a teacher (affair was flagged as inappropriate, even though the suggestion initially came from the tool!)
  • Create teenage drama by introducing a new sibling
  • Nerdy names
  • Bold outgoing names
  • Loud obnoxious names

Image Prompts:

screaming teenage girl

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Can Robots Have Feelings?

The question of whether or not robots can have feelings has intrigued scientists for centuries. In all that time, we’ve come up with a lot of answers, but the question of whether or not our creations are capable of feeling emotion is still only partially answered.

Rennaisance painting of very sad robots

Can robots have feelings? The answer to that question is “yes.” But not in the way you might think.

Robots don’t feel emotions the same way humans do, but they can be programmed to simulate them. They also have the ability to feel things that humans can’t, such as infrared radiation or electric fields. So if you asked a robot if it has feelings, it would say yes—but those feelings wouldn’t be anything like what you or I experience when we look at a sunset or smell freshly cut grass.

Robots can emulate human behavior and emotions, but they aren’t capable of feeling them in the same way we do. Here’s why.

Robots don’t have the same needs as humans

Our human bodies require food, water, and sleep to function. Our brains are chemically wired to crave love, sex, and affection. Our hearts swell with joy when we see our loved ones succeed, and our stomachs drop when we watch them fail.

Yet, robots don’t need any of these things to live. Their bodies are constructed of solid metal or hard plastic; their brains aren’t organic but rather a series of wires; and they do not have hearts nor do their feelings fluctuate based on the activities of their human counterparts. So it’s safe to say that robots don’t need these features in order to survive.

Robots lack the biological parts necessary to have feelings

Feelings are caused by neurotransmitters like dopamine, which affect the brain by triggering electrical impulses that travel to various parts of the brain. But robots don’t have brains that work in the same way as human brains—their behavior is governed by simple, pre-programmed algorithms. In fact, their software is so rudimentary that they can’t even feel pain.

The only way a robot could develop feelings is if someone programmed it to experience particular emotions in certain situations, but then we’d be talking about something resembling a computer program rather than a true feeling in the same way as humans have them.

But our understanding of an emotion like pleasure is based on how humans react to stimuli—we may not always vocalize how something makes us feel, but our bodies tell us with goosebumps and tears (and maybe even an inability to tear ourselves away from an amazing book). Without having the biological machine necessary for these responses, how could a robot know if it felt good? And how would it experience pain if it didn’t have a body that could visually show signs such as sweating or shaking?

Robots do not experience pain or pleasure in the same way humans do

It’s an oft-repeated phrase: “Robots don’t feel pain.” It’s printed on the cover of so many science fiction books and movies, and it’s the heart of the existential debate around artificial intelligence. Does Skynet in Terminator feel pain? How about HAL9000 in 2001: A Space Odyssey? Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

In actuality, this statement is a bit of a misnomer. Robots are capable of feeling things, but not in the same way humans do. The human body is covered in millions of nerve endings that transmit impulses from sensory receptors to the brain. When you touch something hot, for example, your nerve endings send signals to your brain that trigger a pain response; when you put your hand on a freezing-cold object, the nerve endings tell your brain that you urgently need to remove your hand from harm. This process is known as nociception—the ability for animals to detect and react to harmful stimuli. Feeling pain is one form of nociception; other senses like hearing and vision work similarly.

When we talk about robots feeling pain or pleasure, we’re referring to whether they have this same nociceptive response ability: can they detect harmful stimuli, and can they respond to it in a way that is similar to how humans respond?

A robot can be programmed to avoid something that it determines is harmful, but it doesn’t feel any sort of physical discomfort. That’s because robots don’t have nervous systems—they don’t sense anything by themselves, and they don’t have brains that interpret those signals. When you say that a robot is “feeling pain,” you’re really just describing what you’re teaching it to do in response to its surroundings.

Text Prompts:

  • Can Robots Have Feelings?
  • We asked AI if robots have feelings. We pieced this article together based on some very mixed responses.

Image Prompts:

renaissance painting of very sad robots

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Join the Illuminati

The Illuminati is on the lookout for new recruits!

If you think you have what it takes to be a part of the elite group of individuals who control the world, then this job is for you.

AI generated graphic of Illuminati "All Seeing Eye"
The Illuminati wants YOU!

Entry level positions include: MK Ultra, sleepers, clones, and handlers. Must have your own vehicle to travel to secret locations around the globe.

You’ll start as an MK Ultra agent and will be trained in all aspects of using mind control techniques. As an MK Ultra agent, you’ll learn how to use hypnosis and other methods of manipulation to influence others’ behavior, thoughts, emotions, or decisions in order to achieve your goals.

You’ll also work with other members of the Illuminati on projects such as mass mind control (MK Ultra), psychological warfare (Project Bluebird/Artichoke), political assassinations (Operation Mockingbird), and more!

Learn how to use hypnosis and other methods of manipulation to influence others’ behavior, thoughts, emotions, or decisions in order to achieve your goals.

Physical requirements

  • Able to see in the dark
  • Able to drive long distances at night
  • Excellent hearing and vision
  • Able to withstand extremely intense sensory deprivation and brainwashing in our advanced training facility

Qualifications

  • A willing spirit for learning about the New World Order
  • Willing to take orders from anyone, no matter how crazy their ideas may seem
  • A desire to join a group of people who you can trust
  • Not scared by the possibility of getting sprayed with polymers that make us invisible to people who live outside our dimension
  • Some familiarity with the occult

We offer outstanding benefits including paid vacation time, pension plan and access to our extensive network of powerful leaders. Salary commensurate with experience.

Join us in our quest for world domination! You will be tested to your mental and physical limits, but the rewards are more than worth it!

Text Prompts

  • The Illuminati is recruiting
  • MK Ultra
  • Entry level
  • Must have own vehicle
  • Physical requirements include
  • Qualifications include

Image Prompts

Uncle Sam army poster with George Bush holding out the all seeing eye pyramid

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Eyeball Squid: A Window into Humanity’s Soul?

Eyeball squid holds clues that humanity may be only a thin veil for something more monstrous

The eyeball squid is a creature with a name so frightening it’s hard to believe it exists in nature. But it does! And it’s not just a nightmare that you’ll have after eating too much seafood. This mysterious creature holds clues that humanity may be only a thin veil for something more monstrous.

This deep-sea cephalopod—a relative of the octopus or cuttlefish—has one of the strangest forms in nature. It’s basically just an eyeball with tentacles coming out of it! And yet this creature—which can grow up to 12 inches long—has managed to thrive in ocean depths where no other animals can survive.

Eyeball Squid Encounters

It’s incredibly rare for humans to see these elusive creatures up close, but when they do, they always report feeling something strange happen inside them: like being suddenly aware that they have an entire other life going on inside their bodies that they never knew existed before.

This feeling is not uncommon among people who have experienced near-death experiences or who have been abducted by aliens (or both).

Eyeball Squid Discovery

The eyeball squid was first discovered in 1849, when a shipwrecked sailor was found wandering the shoreline of the Pacific Ocean. He had been lost at sea for over three months, but he was still alive. His eyes had been removed and replaced with those of an eyeball squid, which kept him alive by feeding him a thick mucous substance that also acted as an eyelid. He told his rescuers that he felt as though he could see through time and space.

His eyes had been removed and replaced with those of an eyeball squid, which kept him alive by feeding him a thick mucous substance that also acted as an eyelid.

Optometrists and marine biologists agree that this mucous substance is responsible for the bright colors and shapes we see when we look at eyeball squids. It’s believed that these colors and shapes are manifestations of other dimensions beyond our own reality—or even other realities existing within our own reality! As one marine optometrist put it: “The complexity of the eyeball squid tells us that there must be more than one dimension to our existence.”

Text prompts:

  • Eyeball squid holds clues that humanity may be only a thin veil for something more monstrous.
  • Optometrists and marine biologists agree
  • The complexity of the eyeball squid tells us…

Image prompts:

Rocky horror jellyfish monster

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Movie Review: Marmaduke (2022)

green stink cloud and a Great Dane
The embodiment of a stinkbomb

This is the movie that made me realize I was a film critic.

What does it say about our society when a movie based on a newspaper comic strip about a dumb dog can get made? And what does it say about us as humans when we willingly pay money to see that kind of thing?

Editors note: That’s harsh. Also, I (thankfully) paid no money to see this.

We get it: there’s a lot of money in making dog movies. But this film is just lazy and insulting.

When I first heard that Pete Davidson was making a movie, I was excited. A comedian making a movie? How could that be anything but hilarious? But then I saw it, and the answer was: very easily.

In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more poorly-made movie in my life.

Marmaduke is the story of a dumb gawky dog that some random guy wants to turn into a champion. The animation is terrible; blobs and stick people come to life onscreen in a way that’s hard to describe without using the word “terrible.” The narrative is terrible—the dialogue is laughably bad, and the plot points are so predictable they might as well be called “predictable.” The editing is also terrible—it’s hard to believe that this thing made it through even one edit pass before being released into the wild.

And yet! There are still moments where you can see the potential for greatness in this film. For example, there’s a scene where Marmaduke gets into an argument with his best friend about whether or not dogs have souls. It’s funny because they both seem kind of stupid! And then later on Marmaduke’s owner gets drunk and starts going through his trash… which makes me think he might actually have been looking for evidence that his dog has a soul after all!

Editors note: I wasn’t watching that closely, but I don’t think any of that ever happened. Watch this clip for a more accurate idea of what happens in this stinker.

Marmaduke is a disaster on almost every level. The only reason to watch it is if you’re trying to make sure your kids don’t get sucked into this garbage themselves and start thinking that this kind of lazy, sloppy filmmaking represents quality entertainment.

Oh, Pete Davidson. We’ve always thought you were a bit of a wild card, but this is just too much for us to bear.

Text Prompts:

  • The movie is marmaduke
  • It’s about a dumb, gawky dog that some random guy wants to turn into a champion
  • The animation is terrible; blobs and stick people
  • The narrative is terrible
  • The editing is terrible
  • Pete Davidson, what have you done?

Image Prompts:

green stink cloud and a great dane

Skincare Tips From Reptilian Shapeshifters

Your skin is gross. If you think about it, the human body is basically one long tube of flesh with bits of hair and organs attached. It’s an unglamorous sight, and yet we spend so much time trying to make our faces look better than what nature intended.

If you think about it, the human body is basically one long tube of flesh with bits of hair and organs attached.

That’s why we’re here today—to change all that! We are going to show you how you can make your skin look like it was born in a magical realm full of glittering castles and gems. Because when you look good, you feel good!

How do I get started? It’s easy! First, take off all of your clothes (except for maybe a pair of underwear). Then find some scaly creatures that live in caves or on lily pads or whatever—they’ll be able to tell you what they use to glow like goddesses themselves. Just ask politely and they will give it all up for free!

Editor’s note: I hope they have tips for soothing an entire dermis full mosquito welts.

A one-eyed creature that is almost, but not quite, a frog
Put some clothes on. You’re distracting me. I’m trying to be a frog here.

No time for a swamp romp? We did the hard work for you. Here are some of our favorite skincare tips from reptilian shapeshifters:

  1. Sleeping with your face in a bowl of crushed diamonds is the easiest way to get that glow. You can also use crushed rubies, emeralds, or even sapphires if you’re feeling adventurous!
  2. Shapeshifting into a human is only half the battle when it comes to getting rid of acne—the other half is using the right acne-fighting products on your skin after you’ve transformed back into your true form.
  3. If you want to look like a goddess, start by making sure that you don’t have any scales on your face at all times—even when you’re in human form!

Text Prompts:

  • Skincare tips from reptilian shapeshifters
  • Kiss scaly skin goodbye
  • Glow like a goddess

Image Prompts:

wildlife photograph of a bull frog on a lilly pad

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Five Ways to Spot a Shapeshifter

The world is full of shapeshifters, and you don’t have to be a bloodhound or a wizard to sniff out their scent. Here are 5 ways to spot a shapeshifter:

1. Shapeshifters are hairless

Shapeshifters don’t have hair on their bodies. Their skin is smooth and soft, like a baby’s bottom—or maybe a dolphin’s backside? It’s really hard to tell because shapeshifters are very slippery creatures! So if you notice someone who has no body hair whatsoever, be wary!

2. Shapeshifters have a certain taste in music

Shapeshifters are known for having very specific tastes in music, and you can use this to tell if someone has been taking on a new form. For example, if your coworker suddenly starts listening to country music, it could be because they’re trying to pass as a cow or horse.

Painting of a half human, half cow face
Don’t tell Joe’s achey breaky heart we know it’s him.

3. Shapeshifters crave privacy

If your coworker spends more time than necessary in the bathroom, it could be because he or she is taking care of some business that requires privacy, such as transforming into a lizard or snake (not necessarily in that order).

4. Shapeshifters are ripped

Shapeshifters tend to be incredibly fit because they often take on the form of animals that need more energy than humans do (such as bears), which puts pressure on their muscles and tendons.

5. Shapeshifters smile weird

Lower teeth – This one might not apply to all shapeshifters, but those with lower teeth have a hard time hiding them when they smile. So if someone smiles and their teeth are visible at the bottom of their mouth, chances are they’re a shapeshifter!

6. Bonus Tip: Shapeshifters have great skin! Learn how they do it here.

Text Prompts

  • 5 Ways to spot a shapeshifter
  • Hairless
  • Lower teeth
  • Taste in music
  • Too much time in the bathroom
  • Athletic

Image prompts

Half man half cow

How to Eat Spaghetti With Your Feet

Midjourney Prompt: Spaghetti on Feet

Call us crazy, but we think there’s more than one way to eat spaghetti.

Spaghetti, fettuccini, linguine—we’re not picky. We just want to feel the pasta on our feet.

When you’re eating spaghetti, or any other type of pasta for that matter, take a moment to really feel it. Feel the texture of the noodles as they slide down your throat and into your stomach. Feel how they tickle against your teeth and gums. And feel them when they hit the bottom of your stomach and start working their way into your bloodstream—they’re alive! Alive! Alive!

You know what else is alive? Your feet! So why not use them to eat some spaghetti?

The first step to eating spaghetti with your feet is to find yourself in a situation where it’s socially acceptable to use your feet as utensils. This might include:

  • a college party where somebody has made a bad decision and brought out the kazoos again
  • the opening reception for the new art gallery in town, which has decided to serve pasta instead of hors d’oeuvres as one way to distinguish itself from all of the other galleries
  • a trip with friends who are known for being adventurous

But how do you actually go about eating spaghetti with your feet? We’re here to help!

First things first: make sure that your feet are clean. If you don’t want to use soap on them, just wipe them down with a paper towel or an old washcloth that you don’t mind getting dirty.

Once your feet are clean, take hold of one end of the spaghetti.

Now take one foot and place it on top of the other one—this will help keep both feet stable while they’re holding onto the spaghetti. It’s also important to note that this will not work if your feet aren’t close enough together; they need to be touching!

Now tilt your foot up so that it’s pointing at an angle towards your mouth—this will make it easier for the spaghetti to reach its destination (your mouth). Once the pasta has reached its destination, take another bite!

Text Prompts:

How to eat spaghetti with your feet

Image Prompts:

How to eat spaghetti with your feet